Highlights from the US

I recently went to the US to spend some quality face time with a friend. Awesome parts: pretty much everything (see pics below). Not-so-awesome parts: being stoned by jet lag for over two weeks, resulting in the below carefully-managed sleep schedule upon my return.

Red-eye flight back to the UK: 2 hours of plane-doze.
Day 1, 9am: travel home, decide to caffeine up and power through the day. No naps.
Day 1, 10.30pm: acceptable sleepy time. Remember, two hours’ inadequate sleep in 48 hours. Pass out instantly.
Day 2, 8am: wake up to alarm. Go to work.
Day 2, 11.30pm: read until bedtime. Go to bed. Pass out.
Day 3, 4am: wake up. Muse into the darkness for an hour. Fall asleep.
Day 3, 11.30am: wake up. Scream at the time. Curse the sodding fucking alarm that didn’t do its job. Stumble out of bed while texting apologies to colleagues. Run to work.
Day 3, 11pm: eye the valerian root pills bought during the day. Pray for an adequate placebo effect. Take 3. Go to bed. Pass out.
Day 4, 2.30am: wake up. Glare at the darkness for an hour. Count up hours slept since arriving home and realise it’s been an average of nine hours per night. Huh. Take another valerian root pill. Fall asleep.
Day 4, 8am: wake up to alarm. Never has 8am looked this sweet. No, seriously, never.
Day 4, 11pm: so ready for jet lag to be over. Take more valerian root pills. Godspeed, bodyclock.